Thursday, April 30, 2009

random acts of brilliance (charlie)

a typical saturday night until the following occurred...

“it was one of those unique situations where a deposit for urine was both direly needed and wholly unavailable. a group of us were on a roof deck, awaiting our hosts, when the last few rounds of oat sodas caught up with me, and i suddenly needed to de-water with a severe urgency. luckily, the terrace was decorated with a few small evergreens, conveniently potted in wooden boxes about waist-heigh. due to another small gathering of strangers a few feet away, and our hosts' impending arrival, a couple friends assisted in feigning conversation with me and obscuring anyone's view of my miteration. thus protected, i proceeded to relieve myself upon the pygmy conifers. of course, our hosts immediately appeared, with my tanks only half empty. i'd say this was the part of the performance most deserving of acclaim - in a portion of an instant, my sword was returned to its sheath with minimal spilling/stinging, and my friends and i turned to greet our hosts without skipping a beat. trees were watered, kidneys were drained, and our hosts were utterly oblivious to the desecration of their chic roof deck.”

-posted by charlie “Yeah, that’s right, I can stop pissing midstream” hoxie

for those of you who like to visual non-fiction characters: charlie is tall, visually appealing, easygoing, jocular guy who possesses a stellar mustache that can’t help but make those naked above the lip (below the nose) ring red with envy.

are you a person with above-average intelligence who has committed an RAB (random act of brilliance) and would like to share this moment of glory with your peers in order to be hailed properly? If so, e-mail your story to

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